I guess it’s my age, but I’ve noticed personally and professionally that caring for elderly parents is a common theme in life recently. Finding oneself in the unfamiliar role of caring for a parent has its rewards of course, but it can also be draining, isolating, saddening, even traumatic.
You’ve probably already heard about the new Calvin Klein advertising campaign. It’s worked, that’s for sure, in that Twitter and Facebook can’t get enough of complaining about it. And of course the pro-sexism and creepy factions can’t get enough of defending it and lashing out at people who recognise it for what it is – blatant sexist glamourisation of and dismissal of sexual harassment.
83% of our suicides are men. Why is this?
Last year, Leinster and Ireland prop Jack McGrath helped to launch the IRUPA’s Tackle Your Feelings campaign by revealing that he had suffered in silence for five and a half years following the tragic death of his brother in 2010.
I am aware that the words ‘Counselling’ and ‘Psychotherapy’ are often used interchangeably, particularly by clients and members of the general public. However, with the huge increase in training courses and the growing (and very much welcomed) normalisation of counselling and psychotherapy, the definitions of and distinctions between these two professions are becoming clearer.
Did you know that friendships have an average shelf life of 7 years?
The ones that last longer are the deeper friendships that are truly nourishing and good. They are worth your investment, because the joy, fun, trust, encouragement and support outweigh the irritations, the upset, the clashes (which are normal). Even if you rarely actually see each other!
I often hear people jokingly say “Aaah I have a touch of the SADS”. We moan about the greyness of winter, the long nights, the short days. We say our mood is ‘dark’, we hope for light ‘to be shed’ on things, we long for something to brighten our mood, we talk of Winter dreariness. We say it affects us, it’s built into our language. But does it really affect us?
We all think of Christmas as a time for giving to others. And that’s nice, it really is, but when did you last give to yourself? Not necessarily a material gift, but time to yourself or with a rarely seen loved one, fun, nurturing things?
We often forget about ourselves and fret instead about the people we love. Are we not allowed to love ourselves?
(Yes we are!).
So here’s part two of guide to staying sane for the holidays (part one here)
The social part of Christmas is fun.
Ideally.
It’s when we get to connect with old friends, family, maybe make new friends. It can be an incredibly nurturing time and full of genuine care and love. There’s nearly always an accompanying pressure though isn’t there? Like, how can I get to meet everyone? How do I choose who to meet? where to meet them? How do I tolerate the people I find difficult? How do I cope when I have to spend time with a person (or people) I usually avoid?
Part one: FREAKING OUT??
Happily I can tell you that’s quite normal. I myself have noticed the feeding frenzy out there. It’s very easy to get caught up in it. As I type I’m uneasily aware that I am leaving for Cork in an hour and am already preparing myself mentally for the mayhem. People will bump into me, glare at me, and if I’m not careful I’ll lose the Christmassy feeling that I have as my treelights twinkle and dance on the edge of my peripheral vision here!
An article caught my eye on The Good Men Project last week: 30 Ways to Make Yourself Miserable (Along with Everyone Around You). Good title isn’t it? It’s a wordy one though, and being a fan of the bottom line I decided to make a meme and share it here, with kind permission from Lion Goodman, the original author. He even posted it on his site which is nice. Thanks Lion!
