What am I, now that I have lost my child? Lost for a word…

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It’s October again. Already. Infant and pregnancy loss awareness month as designated by Ronald Reagan in 1988.

How quietly it’s slipping by, unbelievably we’re nearly half way  through. And still,  not much has been said. Same as every year. Is it par for the course? Because child loss is one of the many things we don’t talk about – that we “bear” in stoic silence and secret, private agony. One would think, given the outpouring of concern for women and their babies in recent years that there would have been more said this month. Or maybe it’s because so much has already been said – maybe there is a collective compassion fatigue? Are we just exhausted from it? Because loss is exhausting, there’s no doubt about that. Or maybe there are just too many other things going on this month – it certainly has been busy in the media.

Is it that?

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Is Suicide Selfish?

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Some people woke up this morning feeling dark, empty, hopeless. Maybe they didn’t sleep, again. They feel desperate, crazy even, from lack of sleep. Not being able to think straight, not even knowing that they’re not thinking straight. Some people today can see no value, no point in being alive. There is no joy, not even peace. A quiet mind would be enough. But how to get that…

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Managing “post-exam stress” – it’s a real thing!

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Well, that flew didn’t it??!

So, the exams are over and you’re thinking “Yay! Stress? Nah – done, distant memory, ‘be grand now!”

And it is done for some, but for others a new and unexpected stress has already kicked in. It’s a little trickier than pre-exam stress, because the people around you might assume all students are now the embodiment of Zen and relaxation, because technically the exams are over.

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Exams? Hold onto your sanity with these 10 quick tips!

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Just hours to go guys! (Like you don’t know…sorry…)

I’ll keep this simple and not link to supporting evidence – but, as with my last on Leaving Cert tips, know that I have it if you’re interested:)

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Come do a Beach Clean – it’s good for the head (and heart)!

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Aren’t we blessed here in East Cork? As a native of Youghal originally and now back in East Cork I am a dedicated sea addict.

(It’s Ok, I’m aware of it and I can stop any time I want…)

Morning at Garryvoe
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Hello Guilt, my old friend…

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I’ve been meaning to talk about guilt for some time now.

It just keeps coming up. I hear the word everywhere – don’t you? “Oh I feel so guilty now but sure I’ll eat less tomorrow…” or “Oh I can’t not go I’d feel awful “, “Addicted to Netflix? LOL – me too – guilty as charged!”

We’re joking, but we probably mean it. We feel guilty.

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Parenting a Leaving Cert Student?

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Ahhh the stress… Poor things.

And so I wrote this piece for FamilyFriendly parenting website – click to read it. But FIRST I’d like to say this:

Stress is not only normal, but essential, despite our modern distaste for uncomfortable emotions. Good #Mentalhealth is not the absence of #stress, it is the better management of stress.


We cannot eradicate or sanitise exam stress for our children – nor should we. It’s a part of life, much as we hate to bear witness to it!

And in case you missed it I posted this piece for students themselves a couple of weeks ago – a teen in your life might find it helpful!

Stressed out Student
Sttttrrrrresssss

Watch this space for more in the lead up and aftermath of the state exams.

Good luck to all!!

#parenting #leavingcert2019 #managingstress #resilience#tipsforstress #coping #wemustntraisecottonwoolkids

What’s a boundary anyway?!

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We’re trying to buy a house at the moment and there’s been a lot of talk about boundaries. It’s a word I just can’t seem to get away from at the moment! Maps, walls, elections, referendums, therapy … Clear boundaries are crucial to smooth transactions, good legislation, good mental health – the list is long. And gets longer the more you think about it!

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The Dreaded Leaving Cert: A 10 Step Survival Guide

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It’s Easter Bunny time already and we all know what that means…

It’s an incredibly stressful time for students. The reality is hitting – no doubt bashed in by the orals and practicals – and the panic will be well and truly setting in for many of you this week.  The start of your last school hols – ever.

Oh how I don’t envy you…

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