Angry Mama Bird

Share

We’ve had a few generations of starlings nesting in the eaves above the door into my therapy room for a few years now. Like crows, they are a much maligned bird, but I love them. Almost as much as I love crows. I adore them actually – their stunning, iridescent colours, their vocal range, their flying skills, their intelligence. And even though it’s nothing to do with us or our house, I’m always chuffed that they come back to start their family anew. That it’s safe for them to do so here. Despite the regular unintended interruptions as the door opens and closes often, every day, as I welcome clients in, and as they leave. The disruption must be significant as their little nest is shaken and disturbed, each time. Several daily earthquakes.

Continue reading

The Second Violation: Choosing Between Healing and Privacy

Share

It’s hard to avoid all the stories about therapy notes in the media at the moment. I’m glad of it really, glad that we’re talking about it. Every seasoned therapist has, I imagine, experienced the gut wrenching realisation that we haven’t been told about a sexual assault or rape because our client, current, prospective, maybe past, has a well-grounded concern about how her (usually) notes could be used in court.

Continue reading

Walking away

Share

We are blessed with a small but fabulous choice of pubs and eateries near where I live. It’s a tourist haven for six months of the year, attracting people from all around the world. It’s a seriously gorgeous place.

It also draws people home from all around the world, to reunite with loved ones, have the craic, maybe an oul “dalliance” or two… maybe a bump of coke…

Or maybe to throw their weight and sweaty hands around in search of female attention.

Continue reading

Therapist Red flags

Share

I recently read a non-fiction book about a colleague that was deeply chilling – though not, truth be told, terribly surprising. Of course, not every therapist is abusive, coercive, or amoral like the individual described in that book. And, on paper, this colleague looks perfectly fine. (Plus, oddly, I owe my return to writing to them.)

Continue reading

Nauseated

Share

I was, still am a little, in two minds about posting this. But here it is. Over a week old. Because technology and I have a difficult relationship at present.. (as in, I hate it… and I think it hates me…) Maybe it’s best I had time to calm down. I’ve edited out some expletives…but

Continue reading

Parents of teens – this may interest you:

Teenager thinking
Share

This is more of an announcement-for-parents-of-teens than my usual blog-style email for everyone on my mailing list. I’m writing to tell you that I’m making a significant change to my practice which might be relevant to you and your teen.

I’m aware that there are many parents among you who are deeply concerned for your teens’ emotional wellbeing. That you’ve been searching for support for them and are possibly on multiple waiting lists – maybe even mine.

Continue reading

My Friends’ Christmas tree

Share

There’s a lot of talk of tradition at Christmas isn’t there?

The food, the shopping, the gifts, the visiting, the dreaded relatives…

But despite tradition, things always change. Usually without our consent. And some of those changes can be so jarring.

A friend recently asked me if I’d write a piece about loss and bereavement for Christmas. And something weird happened to me when he said it. I felt a block. I reflected on it on and off the past few weeks, wondering had my brain actually finally been emptied of words? Or worse, was it broken? Why wasn’t I flinging open my laptop to release the flow of unedited thoughts as I normally do?

Continue reading

Does restricting teens somehow give them freedom?

Girl with phone sally o'reilly
Share

If you’re from Ireland, you may have heard of Knockadoon Summer Camps. They’re an Irish language summer camp, very popular, and just around the corner from me – well, practically, perhaps not quite literally…

Anyway, a friend of mine had her 2 kids there for the 2nd or 3rd consecutive year and I decided to pop over and meet them all, see how they were getting on. Maybe try and get some scandal re potential romances etc – y’know, the usual old-person-embarrassment rituals (they’re so tolerant of me these two!)

Continue reading