I’ve been meaning to talk about guilt for some time now.
Guilt is a feeling that is familiar to most of us – some more than others of course. And I find that it’s something that comes up in therapy a lot. We in Ireland just love our guilt – we are literally born with the stuff if we are Catholic, which most of us are.
It’s 4am. You’re exhausted, but sleep won’t come. You’re replaying a conversation you had earlier and coming up with things you could’ve said, clever things, better things… and now you worry about the consequences. Then you move onto that crack in the ceiling – what IS that? Is it settlement? What if it’s a sign that you’re house is built on a sinkhole?
As long as the thoughts are bad enough to trigger anxiety they get a place in your private 4am terror fest. Been there? Yes…same. It feels awful.
So the exams are finally over and you’re thinking “Yay! Stress over!”
And it is for some, but for others a new and unexpected stress has just kicked in. It’s a little trickier than pre-exam stress, because the people around you might assume you are now the embodiment of Zen and relaxation, because technically the exams are over.
I’m (not) fine!!
So you might feel a little less inclined to talk about it because at some level you believe you should be calm now.
But it’s OK, post-exam stress is absolutely normal, albeit unpleasant.
Let’s look at how to deal with it with some ‘Do and Don’t’ suggestions:
As therapists, we have a privileged opportunity to share a precious part of our clients’ journey through pain, crisis, vulnerability – but we usually do not get to hear about the “what happened next?”. Often, after the work is ‘done’, our minds wander back to our clients and we can only hope that things are going well. Hope that our relationship however brief, had some positive influence, that they are happier now.Continue reading →
Now I know you’re not all teenagers reading this – and I have no wish to trigger memories of irritating parental demands, but I want you to make your bed.
And I have a really good reason for this. I believe you will feel better when your bed’s made.
It’s been something of a theme this month with client work, a sneaking sense of disorder, an un-ease. Maybe it has to do with settling back into an Autumn routine. A lot of us feel we are back to work, back to school, back to the damn Winter.