My Daughter is Distressed: A Q&A

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Sometimes a parent mails me with a query about their anxious child.

Last week I received such a query. Her particular issue is such a common one at the moment (ungrateful nod to COVID!) that I asked permission to publish both her question and my response. There can be so much isolation, pressure and even shame around parenting that it can come as an enormous relief to find that another parent shares your experiences!

And of course these difficult feelings are exacerbated hugely in lockdown.

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Do you need support with your teen?

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Is your teen on a waiting list with a psychologist, therapist, counsellor or CAMHS? This might interest you.

I’m increasingly aware that there are many teens on therapy waiting lists, and that these lists are getting longer and longer…

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We are the adults – annoying isn’t it?!

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We know so much more than we used about the teen brain and it’s fascinating! We have solid evidence which tells us why teens are impulsive, why they need to hear boundary messages repeatedly to learn, and why it’s so, so much fun for all of them to break rules.

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Funerals in the COVID-19 era: Loss without Ritual

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When you can’t have a traditional funeral it’s a cruel, double loss. This is where we are now.

If you have been drawn to this post then perhaps you have just suffered a terrible loss, and won’t get to celebrate your loved one’s life and mourn your loss with the funeral that you and they might have wanted.

And if that is so, I’m sorry.

This post is about why funerals matter, what might be different without one, how that might affect you, and ways to help yourself through it.

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COVID19 – is it the Perfect Teaching Moment?

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Most of what we’re seeing this last fortnight has been a mixture of horror stories and humour, the kind we Irish are particularly good at in times of adversity. Good old fashioned denial has its place.

But it’s been mostly horror hasn’t it?

Nothing is as contagious as fear.

Fear
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10 Little Tips For You and Your Grieving Child this Christmas

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Christmas has a way of jerking those tears right out of us doesn’t it? It’s a time where the pressure to be happy is really on – HO HO HO! Jeepers. It’s a cheer fest, that’s for sure.  One that would make the calmest people want to gouge their own eyes out if they are also trying to cope with feeling of loss and loneliness. Feelings that don’t “match” with how we are ‘supposed’ to feel Christmas.

Here’s the thing though:

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Should I Allow my Child to Drink on Junior Cert Results Night?

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It’s a question that’s bothering parents all over Ireland today. Probably even more so this year as it falls on a Friday. Kids are coming home from school asking if they can go out, can they drink, can they drink at home? C’mon just the one?? You’re so boring… Everyone else has cooler parents… Can they have their friends over for a couple of cans – nothing too heavy, no spirits in fairness…

In fairness…

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Is Suicide Selfish?

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Some people woke up this morning feeling dark, empty, hopeless. Maybe they didn’t sleep, again. They feel desperate, crazy even, from lack of sleep. Not being able to think straight, not even knowing that they’re not thinking straight. Some people today can see no value, no point in being alive. There is no joy, not even peace. A quiet mind would be enough. But how to get that…

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When Leaving Cert results are disappointing

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So the results are out!

For many, I hope, today brings a sense of relief, achievement and celebration.

YAY!

But for some there is mild to utterly devastating disappointment.

For some, the LC results bring a sense of relief, achievement & celebration. Yay! But for others there is mild or utterly devastating disappointment. How to cope: #leavingcert19 #parenting share with another LC student or parent

DisappointingResults

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