We all think of Christmas as a time for giving to others. And that’s nice, it really is, but when did you last give to yourself? Not necessarily a material gift, but time to yourself or with a rarely seen loved one, fun, nurturing things?
We often forget about ourselves and fret instead about the people we love. Are we not allowed to love ourselves?
(Yes we are!).
So here’s part two of guide to staying sane for the holidays (part one here)
The social part of Christmas is fun.
Ideally.
It’s when we get to connect with old friends, family, maybe make new friends. It can be an incredibly nurturing time and full of genuine care and love. There’s nearly always an accompanying pressure though isn’t there? Like, how can I get to meet everyone? How do I choose who to meet? where to meet them? How do I tolerate the people I find difficult? How do I cope when I have to spend time with a person (or people) I usually avoid?
Part one: FREAKING OUT??
Happily I can tell you that’s quite normal. I myself have noticed the feeding frenzy out there. It’s very easy to get caught up in it. As I type I’m uneasily aware that I am leaving for Cork in an hour and am already preparing myself mentally for the mayhem. People will bump into me, glare at me, and if I’m not careful I’ll lose the Christmassy feeling that I have as my treelights twinkle and dance on the edge of my peripheral vision here!
Firstly let’s define sexting:
Sexting is the sending of a sexually revealing image of oneself or an explicit text using a phone, or other device that is connected to the internet. You will have heard about the celebrity photo leaks, most notably the recent Jennifer Lawrence leaks .
And last week we heard about SnapChat pictures being leaked.
Bullying is a hot topic at the moment. I’m not sure that it’s happening more than it used to, but I am sure that the ways in which we bully each other are more varied. All bullying can feel overwhelming, difficult to witness, difficult to control. And we can feel helpless, victimised along with the child.
As we know, the consequences can be devastating.
In this piece I’m offering some thoughts around the nature of bullying and how best to manage it. I give 5 steps that I’ve shared with many clients, with good results. So they’ve been tried and tested!
The full text is here, on Voiceboks parenting website (great for other parenting tips too!).
Meanwhile here’s a summary meme to give you an idea of the 5 steps. The full explanation of exactly how to carry out the steps is in the full piece. I hope you find it useful!
Sharon Ní Conchuir, a freelance journalist, contacted me with some interesting questions about the impact of technology on our relationships. It was interesting for me to revisit this subject with a different interviewer and offer some more tips on how we can better manage our online lives.
Q: What exactly is the lure of the internet and the various ways of communicating online? What is it that proves so seductive to people?
Yesterday I wrote about my depressing experience in a gym changing room where a little girl sucked in her tummy when she noticed me looking at (admiring) her.
Today, I’ve decided to suggest things we can collectively challenge in our society, things that hurt us and our children. I’m a big believer in taking action!
Here’s a little taster of where I’m going with this one:
I had an unnerving experience two days ago and haven’t quite yet recovered.
This thing happened in the changing room of my local gym.
Here’s a meme I made for the occasion. It might give you a clue as to where I’m going with this…
We have a lovely little castle with proper history that has been nicely converted into a 5 star hotel and in fairness, many celebrities have indeed stayed there. Disappointingly I missed, by mere minutes, an afternoon with a very sociable Bruce Springsteen last summer. And so when it became clear that the newlyweds, “Kimye”, (we can nickname them now ‘cos they’re practically locals) flew into Cork airport, Castlemartyr was the obvious choice destination. So we all went mad looking to confirm that we were hosting new sparkly guests, albeit briefly. It was most entertaining!
This conversation was sparked by the publication of a new study on sibling configurations and looking at whether aspiration and achievment of children is dependent on ‘order’ in the family. Interestingly, the researchers in this case also found a gender difference – specifically, that eldest girls aspire to, and achieve more academically than eldest boys. Naturally enough this sparked much media debate!
