And could there be a formula for learning and teaching it?
Valentine’s day is here and for some, it’s not a rose filled mushy warm day. For some it’s just another day of surviving a relationship that feels difficult, or even abusive. It can be hard to know how to define abuse, and when we are ‘in’ an abusive situation, it can be hard to ‘see’ that it’s abusive. But you might have a niggling feeling, your friends or family may have expressed concern.
It’s been quite an emotional year hasn’t it? No doubt this year brought with it its challenges on a personal level, and as for the macro level – it seems like many of our most talented people have died and left us reeling. My most shocking was Prince, you? And I’m all for the idea of cryogenically protecting David Attenborough until 2017 by the way..
First the super good news: people are asking for Christmas gift therapy vouchers for the first time ever and I think that’s amazing. It’s a sure sign that mental wellbeing is being taken more seriously than ever before and that therapy is being normalised. When I first started out in private practice this was one of my dreams and honestly, I didn’t think we’d get here.
But here we are!
That said, I won’t sell vouchers. And here’s why:
Mental Health Week is drawing to a close and I’m a very happy bunny. There is a real sense of ‘normal’ taking hold in Ireland and this is incredibly heartening! We are beginning to understand that not always feeling OK is OK, that asking for support is OK. We are fostering a ‘knowing’ that we have worth and that change is possible.
Shame-free, guilt-free change.
“Is our relationship healthy? Is it normal? Are we OK?”
These questions come up all the time in therapy – actually, if you’re lucky, they come up over coffee with friends! You’ve maybe had those conversations, praying that your friends will say “Ya! – we fight more than you do actually – you have it sown UP compared to us!”.