Are you a good enough, normal Mother?

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SPOILER ALERT!!! If you're concerned about this then answer is yes... #mothersday #parenting tweet to fellow mum

A friend and I started a blog together a few years ago now and this is where this post originally appeared –  on Mother’s Day, 2015 (feels like last year!!) Not much has changed since then when it comes to parenting and the gnawing fear of not getting it right (whatever “right” is!!). We are acutely aware of how much judgement is out there, and how it seeps into moms’ heads and hearts.

 

So for the day that’s in it, here it is again:

Ah, Mothers Day – a day to celebrate all that is Mother (or Mom,  Mommy, Mama, Mam, Mum, or “Hey You!!” – depending on how your offspring refer to you).

We all know that parenting is one of the most demanding and difficult jobs there are – and there’s no training! (What’s that about?!).  As you can imagine, there are lots of parents out there fretting, wondering if they’re doing it ‘right’.

If you’ve clicked on this you’re probably a mother (or know a mother), so we’ve devised a super-scientific questionnaire based on our collective 40 years’ personal and professional experience to help to decide whether or not you’re a ‘good’ mother.

Ready?

Here we go – be honest now!

PART 1: AM I NORMAL?

the fun of parenting
Have you ever felt like this?

Am i going mad?
Ever wondered this??

real mom thoughts
Ever thought this?

mom thoughts breathe
Ever had this happen?

a moms changed body
Has your body erm…. changed?

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Tips for teaching your son not to be “that guy”.

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Have you been affected by the #MeToo campaign?

I am a huge fan of finding ways to empower ourselves and act to be the change we want. With that in mind I wrote this piece as a “what we can do” response to the Weinstein and consequent #MeToo outpourings on social media – an outpouring I warmly welcome and enthusiastically embrace!

The full piece is on FamilyFriendlyHQ – click on the pic to get there:

Do numbers “do your head in”?

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Are you constantly late? Do you freeze when asked to make a calculation? Do you dread questions at work that will involve numbers? Do you overspend? Do you get  lost easily?

 

Well you’re not alone!

 

Credit: Unknown

These are some of the signs of a condition called Dyscalculia – often referred to Dyslexia for numbers. It too causes difficulty at school, social difficulty and anxiety, but somehow it has received less attention and so fewer people know about it.

 

 

I wrote this piece for Voiceboks.com – and if you think you may have Dyscalculia it may be worth the three minute read!

 

And if your child seems to fit the description, now’s a great time to get help!

Feel free to let me know how you (or your child) get on!

 

Manchester: Parenting in the Aftermath

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You’ve heard about Manchester of course. 22 dead as I type, including kids. Kids for God’s sake. At a concert, having fun, then literally – boom.
What.The.Hell.
Pray-For-Manchester
You may have teared up like I did when you saw the photo of the first victim identified – a sparkly happy photo taken of her with her idol Arianna, the same idol she watched last night. How I hope she enjoyed it.

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On staying together for the sake of the kids

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“What caught him off guard though was that at some level he felt ‘programmed’ to bring conflict and drama into the relationship. Even where there was no evidence of cheating he suspected it. Even though he loved her free spirit he felt he should curtail it in case she ran off. Even though he admired her intelligence he found himself calling her stupid. When things were good he was waiting for something to go wrong – enjoying peace and fun felt alien and weird.
So if it didn’t ‘go’ wrong, he’d make it go wrong.”

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Talking to your child about about sexting

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In my last piece I asked a scary question – Is your child sexting?

And here is the follow-up piece with some suggestions on how to introduce the conversation to your child. And even though it says ‘teen’ in the title – I wrote this with younger children in mind too.

Sexting figures
Sexting figures – I don’t like the word ‘admitted’ but you see where I’m going..

 

Because as you may or may not know, children as young as ten are accessing porn and are being pressured into sexting. So it’s a very real concern that has a lot pf parents worried and feeling powerless. Hopefully, this will help. And if you have any other tips from your own experience and wisdom please do share them below.

             Click here to read the post

Warmly,

Sally O'Reilly Counselling & Psychotherapy

Parenting through a divorce or separation

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“Maybe you saw it coming, maybe you’re in shock. Either way, a separation is extraordinarily painful, even if it’s also a relief.

Sanity and loss aside, your worries will quickly turn to your kids – How will they cope? How will this affect their future relationships? Will they hate you or your spouse? Perhaps themselves? How will things change financially? How will things change?”

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Bring true Christmas spirit into your family – with Santa’s help!

Photo Credit Ina Fassbender/Reuters
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Recently, in my local post office,  I found myself on the brink of boredom in a seasonably long queue. But then I noticed a bunch of excited kids clutching their Santa letters – maybe their first ever letter – maybe buying their first ever stamp! Such cuteness! The atmosphere was electric, the excitement deliciously contagious. I found myself smiling, I could practically smell the Christmas pudding… Continue reading