Category Archives: Rape

Tips for teaching your son not to be “that guy”.

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Have you been affected by the #MeToo campaign?

I am a huge fan of finding ways to empower ourselves and act to be the change we want. With that in mind I wrote this piece as a “what we can do” response to the Weinstein and consequent #MeToo outpourings on social media – an outpouring I warmly welcome and enthusiastically embrace!

The full piece is on FamilyFriendlyHQ – click on the pic to get there:

Can we stop dismissing rape and excusing rapists please?

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It’s great to see a rapist be convicted and receive an actual sentence in Ireland. How sad that I am surprised and relieved.

HOWEVER, we really need to stop with the “no previous convictions” nonsense – which says nothing of a rapist’s character.

The rapist is a rapist – there’s his character right there.

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Violence against Women

Happy International Women’s Day! (but not for all of us)

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So, here we are again. Today is the 108th International Women’s Day and while we have made huge strides in some areas, we have a very long way to go. 

Much has been written in the lead up to today. And much of it grim. I won’t even go into the Tuam babies horror here. To mark the day I thought I’d post a compilation of important pieces about how women are (still) being treated in the 21st century. It’s not terrifically cheery reading so you might want to stop now. I understand, I really do.

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The Revenge Porn debacle – and what we can do about it.

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Some people are saying that the allegations about UCD male students posting “revenge porn” in a Facebook group with over 200 members is ‘unbelievable’. And as it turns out, the allegations went unsupported, there is no first hand evidence to support the claims.

For so many though, the story was totally believable. Some people still believe it, thinking – well can’t the evidence be deleted? Isn’t there sufficient shame around sexuality and sex crime to prevent victims from coming forward when invited, encouraged even?

One major piece that this has highlighted for me is this question: what made this story so believable? And I feel it’s because this happens now, we all know it. For any of us to say otherwise at this point is somewhat naive.

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Does your relationship need a health-check?

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“Is our relationship healthy? Is it normal? Are we OK?”

These questions come up all the time in therapy – actually, if you’re lucky, they come up over coffee with friends! You’ve maybe had those conversations, praying that your friends will say “Ya! – we fight more than you do actually – you have it sown UP compared to us!”.

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Let's teach, rather than blame, our teenagers.

Let’s teach, rather than blame, our teenagers.

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This is my response to figures published today by the Rape Crisis Network. I refer in particular to the disturbing statistic that nearly 40% of sexual assaults of minors in Ireland are committed by under-18s. The Rape Crisis Network’s website is here if you want to view this and other reports.

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